I had to plan a trip to Paris in 2 hours from 2-4 am on Wednesday, then got up 3 hours later, catching the train to Pisa at the very last call whistle. The train ride took like a hour. Carrying my bag though to the Field of Miracles was a pain in the shoulder blade. But once you get there it’s cool. The leaning tower, the baptistery, and the Duomo. We bought tickets for the Duomo/Baptistery for 6 euros and it was cool to look at. The duomo had some famous Pisa people buried there, while in the Baptistery some tour guide lady tested the acoustics which was really cool. Then we went to Mcdonalds. I saw trains from the airport were arriving every 15 minutes or so, so I thought we could catch one right after the 1:55 when. Next shuttle wasn’t till 238, and our boarding pass said last gate closes at 3:50. We rush to Ryanair terminal only to find a huge line. When we get towards the front, we realize there is a visa check only line, because we weren’t checking any bags. My bag weighed more than 10 KG so I was scared to weigh it, but nobody stopped me at all. Getting through security wasn’t bad since I had all small toiletries. Then we had to wait forever for the plane to come, then going to get my ticket scanned I thought I was going to be asked to weigh my bag but nope, people had bigger bags than me. Then on the flight which is first come, first serve. Our plane’s steps wouldn’t close or something so were delayed another 10-15 minutes, then the flight to Paris It was a pretty quick flight, read the Ryanair magazine, slept a short time and then we were descending to Paris Beauvais on the bumpiest landing ever. The shuttle to Paris was kind of tiring (hour 15) and when I woke up I see kids practicing American football in a little caged field. We got dropped off in the middle of Paris with zero clue how to get to our hotel. At first the subway station was confusing as hell since we didn’t have maps that told us how to transfer and stuff. Then we asked for directions from a nice hotel doorman, which was very straight forward. We got off our train station and tried to hail a taxi, but the guy said we were so close, and we were on the wrong side of traffic and he gave us walking directions. Our room at the hotel is kind of a joke. But we have one of the biggest rooms here. It’s a double bed and a single and a moldy bathroom with a toilet and shower where you have to shower yourself by holding up the head. We found a Japanese restaurant open at 11 at night and ate there. I was confused on whether to say Arrigato or Merci half the time we were there. I had four kebabs, 2 chicken, 2 beef, one had cheese in it. The miso soup was excellent.
Day 2-Euro Disney. Getting to the information booth at the metro station, some crazy lady kept changing her mind in front of us and took forever. It was a bitch. Then the lady neatly explained how to catch the train and transfer to the Euro Disney line. Once we got there, it wasn’t so bad. Just when we bought tickets, I found out that Space Mountain Mission Impossible 2 was closed, the main attraction for me in Euro Disney. Main Square USA, is extremely tiny, it’s funny. The pink castle also dedicated to Cinderella was kind of small, but they have a dragon in chains at the lair of it. We first rode the Phantom Manor when a light drizzle, and the only reason I bought a umbrella came upon us. It stopped within 30 minutes or less. The long hallway queue is less scary with a French guy speaking French to us. Then you exit the elevator and the hallway is similar to Disneylands. However in this ride you follow a Bride again. There is the bridge singing in the dining room. After this bride story, typically where the attic for Disneyland Anaheim is, instead of going to a grave yard you go to the Wild West. I shit you not, this made absolute zero sense. My mind is still trying to get around how we went from following a bride to going to the wild west to ending with the bride. I don’t get the French obsession with the wild west. Indiana Jones was a neat little coaster. The line was very short, took like 10 minutes. The coaster has some loops, some drops, some quick turns, and is a neat coaster. I wish it incorporated more Indiana Jones stuff and it would be a better ride than the one in Anaheim. Then we got fast passes for Thunder Mountain, tried to find a place to eat, and ended up at Pirates of the Caribbean. It’s like an attack on the Spanish fortress, the first part of the ride is different and you feel like you’re in the Caribbean and the attack on the fort scene is cool. Except the pirates are speaking French so it’s funny. It’s also weird because you do the ending scene with like the jail and dogs, the pirates singing yo ho, the don’t be chicken carlos, the pirates selling brides, the women chasing pirates scene, the drunk pirate with pigs all first, then you see the dead pirates with their treasure in the captain’s room, bar, etc. It’s like backwards. Then we went to finally eat in fantasyland which is planned eerily similar to Disneyland. Toilets on the far right, then a place that sells burgers right next to us. 12 euros got me a coke, a burger, fries, and a ice cream/nut/caramel sandwich. Was a pretty feeling meal. We rode Pinocchio’s Daring Journey which is exactly the same as the US one without the really crappy birds by the whale, and the fact that its in French and Gimmany Cricket sounds retarded. We then rode it’s a small world, which was smaller and had less characters than the USA one. Tea Cups felt like we couldn’t spin it as much as at Disneyland, then we rode Peter Pan where we had our first bad experience with French people. First thing middle school age cock nuggets cut in front of us while we walked through the queue fully. Then the little kids who we had to walk around were completely little shits. And their parents did not care at all. It was so annoying. Then the ride broke down, and the kids were annoying still. Peter Pan is exactly the same again, except we swung dangerously close to other ships. Then off to Thunder Mountain. It should be Thunder Island since it’s on its own island. The fast pass is needed for this ride. Cut the queue from 45 to 5 minutes. We would’ve been in the front except some Chinese group of 3 didn’t realize they were supposed to squeeze in one spot and the kid got left behind and ended up with the front seat. Bastard. Thunder Mountain was ok, the drops weren’t that big, the speed was fairly slow since we’re in the front, and they set up for big drops only for them to small drops into turns. But it’s a huge space. We then went to Discoveryland, not Tomorrow Land and saw a cool Wall-E and Eve statue. Then we got fast passes for Buzz Lightyear, which is still a similar ride, except it was impossible to hit Zurg in his chest. Then we rode Star Tours, which is old Star Tours, which sucks if you rode the new star tours. Then we left since the best ride in the park, Space Mountain Mission 2 was getting refurbished until Saturday. Then we went shopping in on Main Street, and I’m disappointed in the amount of D-Land Paris stuff they had. I expected tons of shit, not just like 4 different shirt designs. But the Disneyland bonbons are amazing. We then took the subway and made some transfers to the Eiffel Tower. It’s pretty amazing I have to say. The only negative experience is the African/Indian people trying to sell you little Eiffel Tower models. They ruin your pictures almost on purpose it seems. It’s like piss off you turd. But when you tell them non, they understand and they leave. The douchebags in Rome were persistent sons of bitches who didn’t understand No. They leave India with perfect scores in Math for this crap? I can’t get over how sunny it is in Paris until like 10 Pm. Then bam, the sun goes down like crazy fast and its dark. Don’t get it at the 44th parallel, or wherever we are. We then ate dinner at a little café halfway between the sub and the Eiffel tower, and I had a ham and cheese baguette sandwich which was great! We then went to the Arc de Triomphe which the subway station puts you right there. That was cool, especially in the middle of the street where you can take your picture with it in the background. Thursdays in Paris are apparently dead nights.
Day Three-Woke up a little later than I wanted too. Our dick hostel owner wouldn’t let our friend store her bag in our room, so we had to sort this problem out. We made a wrong turn trying to find the nearest metro station and we ended up at Gare du Nord. The main train station in Paris which was huge. We got on the RER C train line to Versailles Palace. We bought our museum passes then went to the Versailles Palace. When you get there is a huge golden gate to the entrance. That was impressive. The line looks long, but took like maybe 15 minutes at most. Then we got inside, got our free audio guided tours and went to the palace. The King had a crazy awesome chapel, it was huge, and gold plated everywhere. The tour of the palace was alright, we only probably did 1/3 of the palace. We saw the king’s room, queen’s room, Napoleon’s throne, etc. The Hall of Mirrors is obviously impressive, as is the room dedicated to murals of French battle history from Charlemagne to Napoleon. It started raining when we out to the gardens. The gardens are fucking huge. The whole property is probably the size of Central Park, and 2/3 of that is probably dedicated to the Grand Canal. We didn’t go to Marie Antoinette’s estate because it was raining too hard. We then went to McDonalds and that was ok. I’ve only had McDonalds three times in Europe, but all in the span of one week. Sunday, Wednesday, Friday, and I get chicken nuggets every time since I like my burgers plain. We then took the train to the Musee D’Orsee. We got in right when they started to close the museum off to new visitors. We didn’t even get our tickets checked, that was strange. The Manet exhibit cost 2 euros so we didn’t go, so we walked around. They had cool works from Van Gogh like his portrait, some Monet’s, some Degas, some other famous paintings. Then they had a random room dedicated to furniture which was apparently art. After we left we ended up going back to the hotel. We our pretty much master’s of the metro station, but I think we are going to the wrong station. I had a crepe with strawberries for dinner. Then we were supposed to go the Rue Moufetard street, which never existed. We then ended up asking some waiter from NY for directions to good bars and he showed us a place with 3 euro Amstel Light pints. Then it took forever to get my phone to work and we met our classmates at the Eiffel Tower. The Eiffel Tower is pretty cool at night since it lights up at the hour. It was freezing so I got a hot dog fromage from a nearby stand. I haven’t ate a Parisian restaurant with Paris cuisine yet. Then I caught one of the last metro’s home.
Day 4-Today we woke up and went to the Louvre. We walked right in off the subway, no line, and bam we’re in the Louvre. We started off with the Egyptian art wing, there is so much Egyptian art it’s not even funny. I’ve been to the Metropolitan Museum of Art, but the Louvre destroys it entirely on many levels. We saw all the fam
ous art stuff from the Venus de Milo, the stele of Hammurabi’s
Code, the Winged Victory of Samothrace, Michelangelo’s Cap
tive, the Mona Lisa, etc. We were worn out of the art stuff by 12, 3 hours after we’ve been there. I can only imagine how crazy the British Natural History Museum is. I also couldn’t believe how so many tourists used flash to take pictures of the Venus and the Mona Lisa, and the staff doesn’t even care to go after them. After that we wandered near the Musee D’Orsee only to see a bigger line than the Louvre, but we passed on going again. Then we walked by the Assembly Nationale, and found a café near the Invalides. It was full of French locals, and like 3 British tourists. I decided to try 3 cheese and bread slices. It was too cheesy, moldy, and disgusting for me. I almost hurled after I learned I was eating mold. One of the cheeses tasted like a sweaty gym sock. It started dumping and we walked to the Hotel Invalides which has like 5 museums in it. We went to the Arms museum, from medieval to 1700s ish weapons/armor. Then saw their World War I-World War 2 museum. One funny sign talked about how France tried their hardest in WW2. We then went to Napoleon’s tomb. Talk about the Napoleon complex. 
His tomb is the biggest tomb I have ever seen before, his casket thing is like 30 by 30 feet, if not more. That was pretty amazing, then we went over the Sainte-Chapelle. I knew about it from Art History so I was excited. The line to get in was long, but the security guy saw our museum passes and let us cut the line. That was pretty exciting. The lower chapel isn’t very impressive, just cool stained glass windows, but the upper chapel was amazing. Since it was a king’s former chapel, it is the only remaining structure from the oldest palace in Paris. It had fleur-des-lies on the roof. Then had beautiful stained glass windows depicting stories of the bible. The statues of the apostles were from the 1300s or something. That chapel was pretty amazing. The only part that sucked is the Cathedral of Notre Dame took the relics that used to be here, in the Crown of Thorns and the piece of the True Cross. We went inside the Notre Dame which was impressive, but the façade on the outside is more nice looking than inside. I wish we went to the treasury room now to see the relics. Had a cheeseburger from a Café near the Louvre for dinner, and the burger was actually really good. We walked around the Champs-Élysées for late night, but it was insanely overpriced and filled with asshole locals looking to harass Americans.
Day 5-We woke up and checked out and went straight to the Catacombs. The line for it was pretty long at 10:45, then we found only, they only allow 200 people in the crypt at a time. It was built after a former rock quarry which was cool, but you get that urge the bones are coming. 
There is over 6 million dead Parisians’ bones in the Catacombs, so that was crazy. They are stacked so neatly, they form designs, patterns, it was really impressive. After that, we went to the same Japanese restaurant near the hotel and then took the subway to nearby metro station. The bus back to the airport sucked because the first one was full, the second one wasn’t as bad. Then getting through the airport wasn’t bad, my bag was over 10 kg for sure, but they didn’t really check. We got into Pisa around the time expected, it’s just Ryanair takes their sweet ass time to load the plane up. I then took the train to Pisa Centrale then to Florence Santa Maria Novella with these other Americans who go to Penn State.
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